why why why?

I did a violent thing for le truc nouveau.

That's french for the "new thing!"

I shot a gun at a shooting range with Max! It was such a bizarre, violent, yet fun experience... the only thing I can really compare it to is bowling. We even shared a "lane."

I didn't particularly like shooting the gun, actually. It was fun in an odd sort of way, but I didn't feel that rush of power that people talk about. It actually felt removed, oddly... sort of like one step away from a video game.

It was safe, though. And really loud! So loud.

We shot a zombie target! I killed a zombie!

I want to write a short story about it. But I'll add something to it to make it better. One of the best things about the shooting range is that the place has taxidermied animals EVERYWHERE.

Man. It felt weird. But I'm glad I did it! Strangest new thing yet!

I will die with my foot in my mouth.

Is it lame that my new thing today was driving home from Chico?

Because that's what it was.

So... there.

let's form it.

Don't you love candy?

I do.

There was a new candy at 7-11 next to the Nerds Rope display. This led me to believe that a) it was going to be as delicious as Nerds ropes, and b) that it was made by Wonka, who makes pretty good things usually. Although Wonka bars are sadly lacking in imagination.

So my new thing was eating that bar.

I imagined that, perhaps, this "Wazoo" bar, in "wild berriez" [sic] flavor would be good. It looked like something a unicorn might eat in magic fairy land - It was pink and about the size of a Snickers bar, covered in imitation Nerds. Indeed, this was not a Wonka product. Just an imitation. So it was an imitation of a facsimile of a fictitious chocolatier - and there wasn't even chocolate involved.

Long story short it tasted atrocious - like stale laffy taffy covered in tasteless marshmallow with chewable plastic on top.


I think my face says it all.